A bit of background, first.
Four and a half years ago, I began to write the Harry Potter fan fiction universe called the Dangerverse. I thought it would be a very short and fluffy story, and was not yet an experienced writer, so I made some choices (a character who is quite Mary-Sue with a deus ex machina ability) that I would not make again.
Recently, I have been having a hard time updating the current story in the universe, Facing Danger. After a seven-month hiatus, I posted a chapter at the beginning of April with the following author’s note:
“Go on, die of shock. See if I care. Yes, I’m alive, no, I haven’t abandoned this, yes, it’s going to get finished, no, I don’t know when. Encouragement via reviews will probably help. No guarantees.”
This is, as my friends will tell you, an example of my so-called sense of humor.
The following is the full text of four reviews I recently received for this chapter:
From: ? ()
What’s up with the attitude? If you’re gonna give this up just go ahead and say it. No need to be such a ** about it.
From: A Disgruntled Reviewer ()
I agree with “?”
Anne B. Walsh, you are a b*tch.
Sounds like an attitude problem to me. coughB*TCHcough
Get off your high horse, will you?
If you’re not going to finish this story, just say so and stop giving us
From: P.O-ed HP Addict ()
I would have reviewed your other stories before, but they’re already complete and I don’t think you would take any notice of reviews posted to those. Plus this is the first time I’ve been able to read all the way to the end of this…this…atrocity.
Anyway, let me now say what I’ve wanted to say since you began your
YOU HAVE COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY MESSED UP J.K. ROWLING’S WORLD.
This story sucks, monumentally and colosally.
And your disgustingly Mary-Sue-like character, Danger. What kind of a name is DANGER? That’s just STUPID. Sure, it gives a lot of opportunities for puns, but STILL…
AND the thing with marrying Remus after two weeks. TWO F*CKING WEEKS. THAT IS COMPLTE AND UTTER BULLSH*T.
GO ROT IN HELL YOU STUPID *SS B*TCH!
From: P.O.-ed HP Addict ()
COWARD! You deleted my review!
Ugh…you’re such an effing sh*tbag, you know that? ‘Ooh, oh NO, this person doesn’t like my story BOOHOOSOB, I must DELETE the review!’
YOUR STORY SUCKS.
Get that through your head, Anne B. Walsh.
YOUR STORY SUCKS.
AND you’re a coward.
AWFUL AUTHOR AND A COWARD, RIGHT HERE!
To these people (or this person, if, as I suspect, you’re just posting under different handles):
Thank you for your input.
I deleted your reviews not from cowardice, but because you are using abusive language and contributing nothing to a discussion of my writing.
Further, if you have read the entirety of the Dangerverse as you claim, I think you’d have been able to find much better examples of my terrible writing than the sophomoric mistakes I made as a novice writer four and a half years ago.
I regret that it is not within my power to replace the time you must have wasted reading my atrocities of stories, but I wonder why, if they’re so atrocious, you kept going. You could just as easily have skipped to my current chapter and given me your opinion there. Perhaps you did.
In conclusion, O King of Thebes, I invite you to gain carnal knowledge of yourself via your main excretory orifice. Thank you and have a very nice day.
P.S. Flaming anonymously with no contact information provided gives you very little scope to call anyone else a coward.